Posts Tagged ‘Toronto FC


MLS week 6 & 7 thoughts…yeah I know I’m late

So as those of you who read my entertainment blog know, I have been busy prepping the Cannes film festival. (yeah, people ask me whether should be made or not. Weird right? Too bad they normally make the ones I’m not too keen on first. Oh well)

As such, I haven’t been able to pay much attention to this blog since, well, it pays nothing since doesn’t allow ads and the other sites do pay me (a little bit).

Anyway, here is a quick list of thoughts and let me start with a quick note on the start of week 8 with the RSL vs. Colorado game.

It was a pretty tight match. The level of play is the highest I’ve seen in the ‘Rocky Mountain Cup’ since it’s inception. This holds true league wide.

Colorado is looking like the team to beat out west and RSL is looking much improved. However, playing in the west it is looking more and more like they won’t make the playoffs again. It’s a shame because they do have some exciting young players. The Argies they added last year have been fantastic.

On to the past two weeks:

First, LA is Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. To expect anymore or less the rest of the year, barring a major move, is folly. They have all the offense in the world. In fact, I am pretty confident that they could blast just about anyone off the field when they are even half on. However, the problem continues being defense as evidenced by their home loss to TFC a few weeks ago. They continue this streak of poor defending and it has been costing them, especially against RBNY who are a vastly overrated side.

LA needs to find a leader. They give up a ton of goals immediately after scoring and it is clear they need someone to holler at them and tell them to focus. 7 years ago a team could over celebrate and get away with it. However, the level of play and competitiveness for spots has increased to such a degree that it isn’t possible to take too many plays off without being punished. You only need as DC United…

…who got the living shit kicked out of them by Chicago on MLS Thursday a week after Chicago beat the shit out of New England for a second time this year. (where’s the excuses for your side this time, Nicol?) DC United has had a pretty strong history of having some talented players, but also having players who drift in and out of matches at times (look at their woeful recent playoff history) The fact of the matter is, the better teams in the league no longer allow you to take plays off anymore. Again, 4-5 years ago this may have been the case, but it simply can’t happen anymore.

The 2 best teams in the league by a country mile are Chicago and Columbus for this very reason. They keep their foot on the gas even if they are having a bad game and more often than not, they have been putting teams to sleep.

The real tragedy is the fact that if current form holds, the league’s failure to structure the playoffs in a straight 1 v 8, 2 v 7, 3 v 6, 4 v 5 format will mean Chicago and Columbus will have to knock one or the other out of the playoffs and play a lesser western team in the final. I know that’s getting way ahead of ourselves as things change almost weekly in MLS due to the relative parity (though it’s looking less pared this year)

However, my complaint stands. The straight table playoff should be the format but it won’t be now that the league tries to do everything possible to get LA into the post-season. Look at the change to the format this year. Last year’s race for spots was the best ever because they made it the top 2 from each conference getting in and then the next best 6 irregardless of conference. However, that was changed to the top 3 and then the next 2 this year which pretty much brings it back to what it used to be. It was a move clearly aimed at aiding the western conference and LA in particular and it’s shameful.

MLS: you won’t be fooling anyone. If LA makes the playoffs as the #3 in the west 20 pts behind 3 other eastern conference teams that would have made it if not for the rules changes, it’s not going to impress anyone. There are a billion other things you could do to give them a competitive advantage. Hell, if you raised the cap $500K they could get 2 high quality defenders and they’d be one of the best teams in the league. They’d probably dominate. Doing it this way just sucks.

I digress. Continue reading ‘MLS week 6 & 7 thoughts…yeah I know I’m late’


Biggest CUNTS in MLS series: Toronto FC (TFC) and their fans

toronto-fc-logo.jpgHmmm…provocative title I know. However, here is some proof of their cunthood:

I like to expose myself to church goers!

I like to talk shit about greatness despite having a team that eats donkey cock!

Seriously, give it a rest TFC fans. You act is so tired and contrived it’s bordering on the pathetic at this point. I know there are a large number of Canadians who wish they were still a PART OF ENGLAND, but it’s simply not the case.

Basically, what we have are a bunch of tools who are good at synchronized streamer throwing (which was happening in the league oh…12 years before you existed) which is the equivalent of a high school girls color guard squad.

I hear a ton of bullshit about how tough and rough and tumble the ‘Red Patch Boyz’ and “U (Poo) Sector” and the rest of you shitbirds are and yet the only thing you’ve proven good at is talking shit to every other team about your greatness despite accruing about 7 points last year and getting drunk and showing your junk to church goers whilst taking a leak.

If pissing in public is the sign of Über supporter status then I’ve been at the pinnacle of supporterness ever since college. Suck on that TFC!

Seriously, douche bags, fight somebody. Even though I loath DC United I can at least respect their supporters for kicking the shit out of some MetroBulls supporters and vice versa (which is amazing considering there are about 10 MetroBulls supporters). Even the Revs supporters, possibly even bigger cunts than yourselves haven’t been averse to a scrape or two. Hell, Legion and Riot Squad routinely get into shit in the stands and the Texian Army and Section 8 are no strangers to controversy either. (probably why TFC wanted to limit the tickets they made available to away fans for the match Chicago is playing there…oh and the ‘but we have near sell outs every time!’ shit doesn’t fly, every team has ‘day of’ sales and TFC is no exception.)

Now, I’m not saying that I condone fighting in the stands and shit and have no desire to turn MLS into Serie A west, but if you are going to talk shit about how great and how ‘European’ and tough your support is it kinda stands to reason that you have to punch at least 5 people in the face at some point to be at least in the running for ‘tough mob’ status.

So that’s it TFC fans. I would basically like you to actually win something and perhaps back up your tough talking shit with some action before you continue this charade.

I mean, how bad is it going to suck when you lose out to Montreal for the Champion’s League even though you are basically being gifted a spot with the bullshit idea that Canada gets a spot and you get to compete for it despite competing in a non-Canadian league?

Oh and before you feverishly start typing your comments, keep in mind that until you actually win something…a title…a game…a challenge in the midfield…I will reserve the right to hold your comment in moderation. Or I might take some editorial liberties with your text, either way. Possibly even publishing your e-mail address if you make a douche bag enough comment.

This is a sounding board for others to share the experiences about the biggest go nowhere cunt douchebags in MLS: Toronto FC and their supporters.

Have an idea for the next ‘biggest cunts of mls’ series? Send it in and I’ll consider writing it, or perhaps even letting you take a crack and post it.

UPDATE: so of course the TFC Poo Sector linked it to their forums at: bullshit/99.8872/post.php or something similarly inane. Uh, it’s called sub-domains chief. i.e.: little easier to remember, yes?

Oh and classy move reposting my entire article. Copyright infringement anybody? If I was a bigger dickhead I’d file a complaint but since I’m sure you you are all still using Mosaic 0.4 as your browser I’m sure web navigation is a bit tough on you. Trust me, some day there will be this thing called broadband and java script and php that will make it’s way to you and make web browsing WAY easier and far ‘kewler’.

Funny that it pisses you off so much yet there are no suggestions for a bigger bunch of cunts in MLS. Kinda accepting the obvious I guess. Don’t worry; I have my next choices for Cunt of the week. Abel Xavier is getting a head start in the competition.

I told you the TFC faithful were into pissing on people and shit play behavior. I guess one of the ‘super fazzz’ socamonarch also has a boner/wet vagina for smacking my ass. Kinda gay if it’s a dude but to each their own I guess. Kenfrom255 is either a plant making fun of him/them or at least has a sense of humor (the thought of a Poo Sector scarf choking being quite arousing). A decent TFC fan with a sense of humor, whodathunkit?:

tfc-fans-are-fecophiliacs.jpg Continue reading ‘Biggest CUNTS in MLS series: Toronto FC (TFC) and their fans’

MLS ASG in DENVER- by eBatty